#also. lmaoooooo 'are a monsterfucker'

[thespacesay]

ID: a tag. #i read dnis to determine whether or not I should let YOU interact lol / end ID

btw people who go "yeah dnis are useless" have clearly never seen a dni and gone "wow! this person is fucking terrible!"

[crystalflygeo]

banging my fists on the table, peeling the paint off of the walls, shattering concrete… you are so real for that full dragon zhongli fic. morally dubious my cock and balls it’s hot and sexy!!! all of my knowledge on reptilian dicks comes from friends with science majors and degrees who have been victim to my monsterfucking rants. anyways…

first, science and math: functioning under the assumption that zhongli is naturally hung, at a reasonable 9 inches, we can extrapolate the size of rex lapis’ cocks based on the size and mass of the exuvia. i’ll save you all of the details but this means both of rex lapis’ cocks, according to the exuvia, sit at a healthy ☆*: 39.5inches :*☆!!! how fun!!! truly a pair of gut destroyers.

the fun stuff: his cocks have wonderful texture to them. ridges galore, even!!! physiologically it’s unreasonable, and fatal, for any human to take two nearly 40 inch dicks but how can you possibly mind when what can fit is so damn good??? two fat heavy cocks ready to serve!!! full of eggs, let him dump them in you.

LMAOOOOOO thank you!! you are right and you should say it it is hot and sexy hehehe sasdfbnjlks true friendship is ranting about your weird monsterfucking tendencies to your friends amen

that said now-

where are you getting these measurements ma'am omg

unpopular opinion (?) but I don't really like it when ppl add straight up "measurements" into smut, not only bc they tend to be wildly unrealistic (yes yes, says the person writing about dragon dick I'm aware) but also because... I just find it unsexy? lmaoooo I like to leave things up to the reader's imagination and interpretation and as someone who uses metric system idek how many is "x inches" at any given time and it just makes me want to search for a ruler //HIT

I do also love to think Zhongli is hung sure sure -w- big ehehe but 9-12 inches is not reasonable HAHAHAHA omg bye

now as for the dragon thing...

I live and breathe by the headcanon that Zhongli can shapeshift yes, and that includes the size of the Exuvia's vessel because we have, in fact, already SEEN the Exuvia in different sizes

those two dragons are most definitely NOT the same size

sorry how did the Qixing not notice? 🤣🤣🤣

this is more fuckable size, I think//hit Probs same model as the one at the rite

anyway lmaoooo why did I go so deep into this pls don't get upset or anything It's all in light fun I swear <3 but I will stand my ground that he can change size I kinda jump back and forth with different ideas about his dragon form yes yes

BUT YEAH I LIVE FOR THEM RIDGES AND TEXTURE HMMMMM massaging and pushing/pulling at your insides ehe yessss two fat heavy dragon cocks yesssssssssss eggs and lots and lots of cum <3